There May Be Complications

"You want me to pretend to be what???? You're out of your bloody mind – what little there is of it."

Angel sighed and rolled his eyes. "It isn't going to kill you. It's not like I'm really going to sell you or anything like that. I just need to have something to offer to get me into the venue."

"Why not take Percy? He'd clean up all right. Or Harm - she'd probably get off on wearing one of those—"

"It has to be someone who won't... who could... Look, it would just be best if it was you. Okay?"

"No. Not 'okay'. Not even on the same pitch with 'okay'. I'm not going into a gathering of demons and vamps pretending to be your chattel. Get over it!"

Angel dangled the keys to the Viper in front of Spike's pouting face. "I could make it worth your while...."

Spike drew himself up to his full height, "Do you really think I'm that easy?"

~~~~~~~~~~

"I want to go on record as saying this is a really bad idea," Spike grumbled, fidgeting with the chains between his wrists. "I don't see why we couldn't just go in fists and fangs flying and rescue the girl."

Angel yanked on the chain attached to the collar around Spike's neck. "A," he hissed, "We don't know who has her or where she is yet. And B – you moron – slaves aren't supposed to be growling and arguing with their owners, so shut the hell up."

"Yank that chain like that again, and I'll feed it to you," Spike snarled under his breath, even as he pretended to be cringing away from Angel's raised fist.

Angel shifted into game face and snarled convincingly, "Need I remind you, William, of what a bad idea it is to piss off Angelus?"

"Oh ho, so that's how we're playing it then?" Spike subsided and followed behind Angel as he greeted various demons and vampires. They both heard the rippled whisper going through the crowd. "Angelus. Angelus is back, and he's got William the Bloody on a leash."

They circled the large room, quickly identifying their client's half-demon daughter, standing on a carpeted platform wearing little more than the chain around her neck. Although her pointed ears, softly furred back and short tail indicated her demon heritage, the tears on her face were pure human as she cringed away from the hands reaching to touch her. Angel stopped a short distance away and urged Spike up onto the other small platform placed there for sellers to display their wares.

In no time, a curious group had grown around them, most only eager to see the two famous members of the Scourge of Europe but a few seemed genuinely interested in Spike. Every time he started to snarl at a hand feeling his bicep, or running up a muscular thigh, Angel yanked on the collar. Spike was a few yanks away from throwing the entire charade down the drain when he caught a glimpse of their intended rescuee and the fear on her face.

Ducking his head and turning it so that only she could see, he gave her wink, smiling briefly as he saw her eyes widen in understanding. He bit back a snarl when he felt a rough hand on his bare ass, silently cursing Angel for his insistence that Spike be dressed – or not dressed – to show off his obvious assets. He almost choked when he realized who that hand belonged to.

"Stand up straight, boy," Angel said. "Let them see why I allowed Dru to make you."

Vowing to make Angel pay for this job for the rest of his unlife, Spike smothered his urge to bite the hand urging him upright and stood up straight. He couldn't help standing even straighter when he heard the appreciative murmurs from the crowd that had gathered. He allowed his eyes to roam insolently over the gathered customers, letting them pause briefly when an expensively dressed vampire licked her lips and smiled at him. He arched an eyebrow at her, then continued his perusal of their audience.

after satisfying their curiosity, most of the demons eventually wandered away to watch a pit fight on the far side of the big warehouse. The only ones left near Spike and Angel were mostly female and mostly vampires; only one very human looking, if very large, demon remained studying Spike with a critical eye. He gestured to Angel, carrying on a whispered conversation, then they shook hands and he walked away after giving Spike one last lingering glance.

"What the bloody hell was that all about?" Spike growled softly.

"Nothing you need to worry about," Angel said, giving Spike a smack on his bare ass. "Let's go to work."

Taking advantage of the now mostly empty space around them, Angel engaged the handler holding the pretty demon's chain in conversation while Spike slipped out of the unlocked chains he'd been wearing and quickly helped the girl down from her platform. While Angel broke her captor's neck and yanked the chain away from his lifeless hand, Spike whispered reassuringly to her and began to lead her behind the curtained backdrop. As soon as they were out of sight, they hustled her toward the exit, bursting out just ahead of the outraged shouts from the sale's managers.

They threw themselves and their kidnap victim into the back of the black van in which Wesley and Gunn had roared up, falling to the floor in a heap as it accelerated away. Spike grabbed his leather coat, which he'd made sure to put into the van before he'd stripped down to his "costume", then realized that the shivering girl with them was as nearly naked as he was.

"Here you go, luv," he said, handing her the coat. " 's bit chilly in here for somebody with warm blood."

She gave him a grateful smile, pulling the coat around her and trying not to look at his body as he settled back against the wall of the van. Spike smirked at her blush and laughed when Angel rolled his eyes.

"Job well done, then, yeah?" he said with satisfaction. "Client rescued, and no harm done. Good thing nobody wanted to buy yours truly, innit?"

"Uh, Spike, about that...."